If you’re in the trenches right now, juggling breastfeeding, parenting, and everything else that comes with this incredibly rewarding but powerfully demanding phase, please know that you’re not alone. It can feel like an endless cycle of demands on your body, mind, and heart, and finding moments for yourself seems impossible. But let me share some tips with you that I know make a difference—not just for your wellbeing, but for your ability to keep being the incredible mama you are.
1. Prioritise Sleep—The Foundation of Everything
You don't need me to tell you that sleep is everything. It’s the foundation of wellness, and without it, it’s so much harder to function through the day. I remember feeling like was wading through a sleepy soup each day of the first few years of my son's life. It was brutal. One tip that didn't occur to me until years into my motherhood journey is, if you can, go to bed at the same time as your little one(s). I know—you’ve got a million things to do, but trust me, getting that early chunk of consolidated sleep makes all the difference. Yes, this means doing things like preparing for tomorrow or tidying up when they’re awake, but you can involve them in little ways—chopping fruit, tidying up together, or even asking them to “help,” you with small tasks. It will almost certainly take longer, but the reward is so worth it.
At the start of the night, we typically experience more slow-wave sleep, which is the deep, restorative phase of sleep that plays a crucial role in brain function, memory consolidation, mood regulation, and overall cognitive performance. This phase of sleep is essential for repairing the body and rejuvenating the mind, which is why prioritising an early night can have such a profound impact on your physical and mental well-being. By giving yourself the chance to benefit from these deeper sleep cycles, you are helping to optimise your energy, focus, and emotional resilience throughout the day. This simple change can have a profound effect on your overall energy and resilience.
2. Hydration is Key
We’re all told to drink more water, but as a breastfeeding mama, it’s not just a suggestion—it’s essential. I really struggled with this beyond those first few months when my son was immobile and in my arms all day. Once I returned to work, I found it almost impossible to juggle meeting this most basic of needs and if I'm honest, it's still a challenge for me now. Keeping yourself hydrated helps maintain your milk supply and prevents that familiar, draining fatigue. My top tip here: get yourself a water bottle or flask that you can easily use with one hand. Ideally, one with a straw. I know it sounds simple, but it makes all the difference when you’re juggling a nursing baby or toddler in your arms. I drink so much more on the days when I make my morning tea in a 1 litre flask that I got for Christmas. Sip throughout the day, especially during those times when you’re busy with the kids, and it’ll be a game-changer.
While we’re on the subject of nutrition, consider taking a breastfeeding vitamin. These can provide essential nutrients you might not be getting in your diet, especially during those hectic days (or who are we kidding, most days!) when making a balanced meal feels impossible. There’s no shame in supplementing—it’s just another way to make sure your body gets what it needs to keep nourishing both you and your little one.
3. Start with Protein First
This one’s so simple, but it makes a huge difference: always start your meals with protein. This helps balance out your blood sugar and prevents those awful slumps we all know too well. Protein stabilises your energy levels and keeps you feeling full longer, which is exactly what you need when you’ve got a million things going on. Opt for eggs, nuts, seeds, or lean meats—anything that’s easy to prepare, and make sure you’re keeping your blood sugar in check throughout the day. When your body has the right fuel, you’re going to feel so much more capable of taking on what comes your way.
4. Take Preventative Breaks (Even if It’s Just 5 Minutes)
As a mama, your to-do list never ends. But that doesn’t mean you should have to be in survival mode all the time. My advice: take breaks during the day—little moments of stillness. It might be five minutes while you pee, or ten minutes after the kids are asleep. If you can, give yourself permission to do nothing. You might want to meditate, do some simple breathing exercises, or just lie there, allowing your body and mind to reset. Even 15 minutes of screen time for your kids can be your time to sit quietly and simply breathe. You’re not failing if you need this. Remember, stillness is necessary. Without these moments, you will burn out.
I say this as a mama of one sensitive, neurodivergent little boy, who nursed for three years and nine months. He only ever slept with me in the first two years of his life, aside from a rare occasion with his dad in a sling. I worked full-time without a village of support, so I know how challenging it can be to carve out even a moment for yourself. But even without that “village,” we can create our own space for sanity, and this is where we start. Find those moments of peace, no matter how small. You can listen to my 10 minute meditation for breastfeeding mothers, here.
5. You Matter, Too
This is such a simple mantra, but it’s one that can completely transform your mindset: me too. When you’re preparing nutritious, beautiful meals for your children, don’t forget to prepare something for yourself, too. Don’t just nibble on their leftovers or eat what you can grab in the rush. You deserve the same care and attention that you’re giving them. You are one of the people you love, too. As mothers, we often put ourselves last, but by including yourself in the care you give your family, you remind yourself that your wellbeing matters just as much. I know it can feel selfish at times, but you cannot pour from an empty cup. And, by making time for yourself, you’re not just taking care of you—you’re also setting an example of self-love and self-care for your little ones.
You don’t have to compromise your attachment-based, responsive parenting philosophy to care for yourself. By prioritising your own needs, you’re modelling balance, self-respect, and love for your child, too. Yes, it takes some practice, but I promise that it gets easier with time and you are so worthy of this love and care.
In Closing
I want you to know, mama, that you are already doing the most. Whatever phase you’re in—whether it’s the early days of breastfeeding, starting solids, or managing it all while juggling other responsibilities—remember that you are giving your child exactly what they need. It might not always feel like it, but every small step you take towards nurturing yourself, your body, and your mental health helps build a stronger foundation for you and your family.
We all need support, even if it doesn’t come in the form we expect. Al give yourself permission to be your biggest champion, because I know that you won't ever give up on you.
With love,
Danielle
❤️
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